a time to laugh

ernestanderson

Rev. E. Anderson
SUNDAY SCHOOL FUNNY

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her 4th grade class.

After explaining the commandment to honor thy father and mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?”

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”

A GOLIATH FUNNY

An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket containing a mummy. After examining it, he called the curator of a prestigious natural-history museum. “I’ve just discovered a 3,000 year-old mummy of a man who died of heart failure!” the excited scientist exclaimed.

To which the curator replied, “Bring him in. We’ll check it out.”

A week later, the amazed curator called the archaeologist. “You were exactly right about the mummy’s age and cause of death. How in the world did you know?”

“Easy. There was a piece of paper in his hand that said, ‘10,000 Shekels on Goliath.'”

CHURCH FUNNY

YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN A LARGE URBAN CHURCH WHEN…
By Charlotte Riegel

~ You have to ride a shuttle bus to get to the worship service

~ You stand in line waiting for the previous service to end and when it does, you feel as if you are swimming upstream

~ You have attended the same church, at the same time each weekend, for the past month and have not heard the same preacher twice

~ You wonder why there are hymn books in the pew rack that are never used

~ There is a 400-seat prayer chapel besides the 2000+ seat main sanctuary

~ You have to speak with a pastor through the appropriate administrative assistant after getting past a receptionist

~ The staff are required to wear picture ID tags

today’s thought:

The reason politicians try so hard to get re-elected is that they don’t want live under the laws they’ve passed.

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