a time to laugh

ernest kitchen

Rev. E. Anderson

FUNNY SAYINGS

~ A little boy was overheard praying, “Lord, if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a real good time like I am.”
~ All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
~ Asked to write a composition entitled, “What I’m thankful for on Thanksgiving,” little Johnny wrote, “I’m thankful that I’m not a turkey.”
~ Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
~ Broken pencils are pointless.
~ Christmas began in the heart of God. It is complete only when it reaches the heart of man.
~ Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect.
~ Depend on the rabbit’s foot if you will, but remember it didn’t work for the rabbit.
~ Did you ever want to call a maternity ward and ask if they deliver?
~ Don’t let aging get you down…It’s too hard to get back up!
~ Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it that often.
~ I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
~ I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
~ I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
~ I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
~ I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

~ I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down.
~ Misers aren’t much fun to live with, but they make great ancestors.
~ Nothing makes a person more productive than the last minute.
~ Some people are wise; some are otherwise.
~ Someone showed me how static electricity worked today. I was shocked.
~ The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.
~ The best nicknames are the ones people don’t know they have.
~ ~ They say the pen is mightier than the sword. But if you miss a deadline you’d better bring the sword.
~ Tried to play my shoehorn. Managed to make some footnotes.
~ Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

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dave’s snippets

new-image

Dr. David Allen

CHRISTIANS OF  THE  HOTTER SORT

 I   have a friend   who   has pictures  of men and women pinned in his office  – heroes and heroines  who have inspired   him. I  now  have no office  so no board to pin my pinups on; but I have my heroes   and heroines  nevertheless.  Among the obvious   ones, Mandela and Martin Luther King, I have a few lesser luminaries and most  of them  belong to that  broad  Christian movement   of the sixteenth and  seventeenth century, the Puritans.

 They have generally had a  bad  “press” and in the popular mind  they are regarded  as  killjoys  and  hypocrites. This is far from the truth, as a positive    view of their lives discloses. John Bunyan, the tinker of Bedford wrote one of the greatest of Christian classics and  Oliver Cromwell  laid the basis of   constitutional monarchy.  The  Quakers  advanced feminism and were in the forefront  of many  positive social changes, notably in education and prison reform .A  group of separatists,    the so-called Pilgrim Fathers, founded what became the United States;  in the later  seventeenth century leading Quaker William Penn established  the model colony of Pennsylvania. In brief summary, these were important progressive  steps  by devoted Christians  and often  swimming  against the tide in their time. One of the Puritans arguably  stands  above the rest-   a great polymath Puritan amongst  a  host  of  worthies.

John Milton, intending  to   enter the clergy,  turned his back on that career  when  he objected to the High Anglican  changes  introduced   by  Archbishop Laud  and  began to devote  his  literary talents to the Puritan cause. As both a poet and polemicist he  proved to be outstanding. Despite   being blind from about 1650 he served  the Commonwealth as its  Latin  secretary in correspondence with European  governments  and produced his poetic masterpieces: Paradise Lost, Paradise Regained  and Samson Agonistes. 

 As far as  am concerned, Milton was the greatest of Puritans, though  by no means orthodox in his political and theological views ; and  his varied  talents    belie   the popular view   that  they were   straight- laced killjoys. In fact   the Puritans  have   been  described as  Christians  of the hotter sort.  As such   they   ought to be our model  for all who claim  the name of  Christian,   as Jesus tells us  that there is no  place for lukewarm  religion(Revelation 3:16).  And so to be    termed a Puritan  is no bad thing in a  time of  tepid  spirituality  and lax  morality.  They were devoted to God  and   devoted  to the service of  their fellow men. 

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focus

ernestanderson

Rev. E. Anderson

THE BENEFITS OF WORK

“All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty” – Proverbs 14:23

When your alarm goes off at 6:00 on Monday morning after a hectic weekend, you may find it difficult to remember why you go to work. Why is it, you won­der, that I can’t stay in bed for a few more hours, then spend the day doing what I like to do? It slowly dawns on your sleep-fogged brain: That’s rightHike being able to pay the bills. I like being able to provide for my family. And, most of the time, I even like what I do.

The writer of Proverbs would offer a hearty affirmation. Work is a profitable way for us to spend our days. First, there are the obvious reasons. We get paid for our work, which enables us to meet our material needs and then some. Depending on our circumstances and our decisions, the material profit is lesser or greater.

But work is not only profitable because of what is produced. It is also good because of what it does for our character. The process itself is valuable. Hard work occupies our minds—it directs our energies and sharpens our faculties. It also keeps us from temptation. There’s not much left over for schemes of corruption or immoral­ity if most of our energy is funnelled into work. Work gives us goals and purpose, a reason to get out of bed on Monday morning, as we look forward to die next days, weeks, months, and years. And finally, hard work is therapeutic. During times of tur­moil, confusion, and loss, it gives us an outlet, a way to get away from the source of our pain and do something productive. Then, when the pain has passed or at least eased, we can look back on that difficult time and see something we’ve accomplished.

Without work, all we’ve got is talk. Proverbs doesn’t say talk itself is bad, but mere talk—talk unaccompanied by action—leads to poverty. If we don’t work, it isn’t long before physical hardship sets upon us. And spiritual poverty is not far away, especially if we let temptations preoccupy our thinking.

Yes, work is hard. It bends our backs, roughens our hands, and taxes our minds. But it’s also a blessing. The next time you have a hard time crawling out of bed to get ready for work, say to yourself, “All hard work brings a profit.” It might not bring a bounce to your step and a sparkle to your eye, but it just might get you into die shower.

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focus

ernest reading pose

Rev. E. Anderson

LET IT GO

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick” – Proverbs  13:12.

Have you ever waited for something for a very long time, constantly hoping that it would come to fruition? Maybe you were anticipating the offer of a better job. Maybe you were hoping your boss would follow through on her promise to hire help for you. Maybe you thought you’d get a raise. Maybe you were expecting a profitable quarter, the promise of investment capital, or a turn around in your industry.

Whatever it was, how did you feel when it didn’t happen when you thought it would? Week after week, pay check after pay check, quarter after quarter, year after year—nothing. No change. No results. Just disappointment, again and again. If you’ve been there, you can surely identify with this proverb, even if you might not have thought to phrase it this way.

Hope deferred made your heart sick.

What can we do to heal a sick heart? Is there any cure at all, or is it a terminal illness? If we’re to maintain our sanity, there comes a time when we may simply have to put our hope away. We need to tuck it away on a shelf where it’s out of sight even if it’s not out of mind. We may not forget whatever it is we’re hoping for, and we might even continue to pray that it will still happen. But we have to move on. We can’t spend all our energy hoping that one thing will happen; if we do, we’ll miss out on the blessings God has for us today.

Is there a hope in your life that you need to put on the shelf? It can be very difficult to grab a step-stool and place that dream high above your head where only God can see it. But maybe it’s time to let it go and to start hoping for something else.

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a message from the late david wilkerson

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Rev. David Wilkerson

WHO TOLD YOU  THAT YOU WERE UNWORTHY

Who told you that you are unworthy — no good, useless to God? Who keeps reminding you that you are weak, helpless, a total failure? That you’ll never measure up to God’s standard?

We all know this voice comes from the devil himself. He is the one who keeps you convinced God is angry with you. You hear his lies all day long and they come straight from the pit of hell.

Who tells choir members they are not worthy to sing praises in God’s house? Who tells musicians they are not worthy to play instruments of worship? Who tells elders, ushers, Sunday school teachers, volunteers, people in ministry, people in their pews they are unworthy? Who reminds them of every sin and failure and accuses them of having unclean hands and an impure heart? Who tells them they have no right to touch the holy things of God?

The hounding voice of the devil — the accuser of the brethren — tells you, “God can’t use you until you sit down and get this thing figured out. You can’t even come into His house until you’ve made yourself worthy.”

The devil has convinced many of you reading this message that you are unworthy ever to be used of God. Perhaps you feel unworthy even to be called a child of the Lord. When you look at your spiritual life all you see is inconsistency. And the enemy keeps lying, constantly reminding you of your failures, always harassing your spirit.

Let me stop here and confess something to you: I have never once, in all my years of ministry, felt worthy of my high calling as a preacher. Throughout my service to the Lord, I have been barraged by accusations that I am unworthy to speak for God — unworthy to preach, to teach others, to be a leader.

I am not worthy to write this message and you are not worthy to raise your hands in praise to God. Nobody is worthy — not in our own human strength and power. But Jesus has told us, “I have made you worthy.”

“For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall many be made righteous” (Romans 5:19)

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pastor’s weekly thought

ianwilliams

Rev. Ian Williams

SUNDAY’S A COMIN’

It’s Friday and Jesus is praying, Peter is sleeping and Judas is betraying – but Sunday’s a Comin’.

It’s Friday and Pilate is struggling, the Sanhedrin are conspiring and the crowd is vilifying but they don’t know that…Sunday’s a Comin’.

It’s Friday and the disciples are running in every direction like sheep without a shepherd and Mary is crying and Peter is denying, but they don’t know…that Sunday’s a Comin’.

It’s Friday and the Romans beat my Jesus and they robe him in scarlet and they crown him with thorns, but they don’t know, Sunday’s a Comin’!

See Jesus walking to Calvary, His blood dripping and His body’s stumbling, and His spirit’s burdened, but see it’s only Friday and Sunday’s a Comin’!

It’s Friday and the world’s winning and people are sinning and evil is grinning…buts it’s only Friday!

The soldiers nail my Savior’s hands to the cross and they nail my Savior’s feet to the cross, then they raise him up next to criminals… it’s Friday, but let me tell you something… “Sunday’s a Comin’!”

It’s Friday and the disciples are questioning, “What has happened to our King?” and the Pharisees are celebrating that their scheming has been achieved, but they don’t know…it’s only Friday and Sunday’s a Comin’!

It’s Friday and He’s hanging on the cross and He’s feeling forsaken by his Father, left alone and doubting, can nobody save him? Oh…it’s Friday…but Sunday’s a Comin’!

It’s Friday and the temple veil is ripped from top to bottom and the earth shook – the rocks split and tombs opened. The centurion screamed in fear ‘Truly He was the Son of God!’ Sunday’s a Comin’

It’s Friday and the Earth trembles and the sky grows dark and my King yields his spirit…it’s Friday…hope is lost…death has won, sin has conquered…and satan’s just a laughin’

It’s Friday and Jesus is buried, a soldier stands guard and a rock is rolled into place…but it’s Friday…it is only Friday and Sunday’s a Comin’!

People are saying ‘As things have been, so they shall always be and you can’t change anything in this world”, but Sunday’s a Comin’!

It’s Friday and satan’s doing a little jig saying ‘I control the whole world! But Sunday’s a Comin’!

IT’S SUNDAY!!! The angel like dazzling lightning, rolled the stone away, exclaiming, ‘He is not here! He is risen!’ IT’S SUNDAY!!!! IT’S SUNDAY!!!! IT’S SUNDAY AND JESUS IS ALIVE!

(Taken from African American Prayer)

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christian testimony

meganfox

Megan Fox

ENCOUNTER THAT TRANSFORMED ME

MEGAN Fox has revealed she can speak in tongues.

The Transformers star revealed she received the gift from God while attending her Pentecostal church in Tennessee.

Megan, a devout Christian, says she often feels overcome by religious fer­vour when she attends church.

She said: “The energy is so intense in the room that you feel like anything can happen. I have seen magical, crazy things happen. I’ve seen people be healed.

“Even now, in the church 1 go to, during praise and worship I could feel that I was maybe getting ready to speak in tongues, and I’d have to shut it off because I don’t know what that church would do if I started screaming out in tongues in the back.”

When asked how speaking in tongues feels, she added: “It feels like a lot of energy coming through the top of your head – I’m going to sound like such a lunatic – and then your whole body is filled with this electric current.

“And you just start speaking, but you’re not thinking because you have no idea what you’re saying. Words are coming out of your mouth, and you can’t control it. The idea is that it’s a language that only God understands. It’s the language that’s spoken in heaven. It’s called ‘getting the Holy Spirit’.

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beginner’s course

JOHNWILLOUGHBY (2)

Rev. John Willoughby

9/. FAITH.

Heb 11:6. The reason God has set such a high priority on faith, is because by it we not only come into relationship with Him, but also become dependant on Him. All followers of Jesus are called to this walk of faith.

1/. WHAT S FAITH?

We read in Heb 11:1, “What is faith? It is the confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see”. It releases us from our limited capacities and takes us beyond our five senses of seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling and touching. By it we move from in-ability to His-ability, from self-trust to God-trust and from reliance on our own limited source of knowledge to receiving from His unlimited source.

2/. THE BASIS OF OUR FAITH

a) The nature of God * He cannot change. Jms 1:17. God speaking of Himself said, “I am the Lord and I do not change” (Mai 3:6).

* He cannot lie. Num 23:19. Jesus said of Himself, ‘I am …. The truth” (Jn 14:6), of the Holy Spirit, “He will guide you into ay truth” (Jn 16:13) and of the Father, “make them pure and holy by teaching them Your words of truth” (Jn 17:17).

* He cannot fail. I Chron 28:20. Speaking of God Job said, “I know that You can do anything and no one can stop You” (Job 43:2).

b) The Word of God. Heb 4:11-13. His Word is not only alive, but it also stands true forever. Jesus said, “Heaven and earth will disappear but My words will remain forever” (Mt 24:35). Faith is released when God brings a specific word of revelation from His written Word, directly to us in our circumstances.

c) The redemptive work of the Son of God. Rom 5:1-2. Christ has become the source of our faith. Paul wrote, “I live my fife in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me” (Gal 2:20). The fact of His death and resurrection provides ground for our believing.

3/. THE WORKING OF FAITH

The principles of faith are to operate in our lives continually, no matter what the circumstances.

a) God gives us faith. Heb 12:2. Paul wrote, “God has dealt to each one a measure of faith” (Rom 12:3. NKJ). The righteous live by His faith – the faith that He gives us as a gift.

b) God gives us a ‘word’. Josh 1:8. Paul wrote, “faith comes from listening to this message of good news – the Good News about Christ” (Rom 10:17). God encourages us by speaking a ‘word’ relevant to our circumstances. This may come as we read the Bible or by hearing the voice of the Holy Spirit.

c) God asks for action. Mt 7:24-27. Faith is active, not passive. The Bible says, ‘So you see it is not enough just to have faith. Faith that does not show itself by good deeds is no faith at all – it is dead and useless” (Jms 2:17). Most of God’s promises are conditional – He will do His part, if we will do our part.

4/. THE TEST OF FAITH

a) The trial of our faith. I Pet 1:6-7. This is a period of testing, when everything happening around us seems contrary to what God has said and there seems to be no natural evidence for our believing. Concerning the trials of Joseph the psalmist wrote, “Until the time came to fulfil His word, the Lord tested Joseph’s character” (Ps 105:19). At such times we caste ourselves on His faithfulness and rest completely on His word to us (13 Tim 2:13).

b) The result of steadfast faith. I Jn 5:4-5. The end result is always victory on the part of the believer, bringing glory to God. After Joseph was tested we read, Then Pharaoh sent for him and set him free; the ruler of the nation opened his prison door” (Ps 105:20). Through testing our faith is strengthened and becomes as fine gold – of utmost value in God’s eyes.

MY COMMITMENT

Today I decide to live by faith and trust in God’s faithfulness, grace and enabling power in all areas of my life. I acknowledge my need to be totally dependent on Him – in problems, challenges and difficulties. I will teach others also to walk by faith in God..

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pastor’s weekly thought

ianwilliams

Rev. Ian  Williams

PASSION
Robin Heart

This is Passion Week. Passion means one thing in the world, but the word ‘passion’ goes deeper in the terminology of heaven. Passion speaks of sufferance, of brokenness, of sacrifice. Does God passionately love people? Well, God so passionately loved the world that He gave His only son (John 3:16).

Nothing great has ever been achieved without passion. Think of all those Olympic victories, those inventions, those acts of kindness and sacrifice, do you think they would have happened without passion? Everything Jesus did and does, everything we should be doing, stems from passion.

The crowd in Jerusalem were passionate as they heralded the entrance of Jesus on a colt. They waved palm branches as a proclamation of the coming ruler and shouted ‘Hosanna’, even the children. Many within the crowd were aware of the prophetic significance of this prophet riding on a donkey during the Festival of Passover. At last, here was the king coming to overthrow the power of the occupying forces. If only he could gain a mass of support from the people then the Jews could overcome the Romans. But the crowd were hoping for a different type of king, a different type of ruler. Jesus would know that within a matter of days the mood within the city would change and He would need to give His life for all mankind.

Jesus’ passion was people, all members of society, not just those who are recognised or influential but all people.

We need to have passion:

  1. 1.      To praise the name of Jesus
  2. 2.      To love all those in our community
  3. 3.      To pray for our town and neighbourhood
  4. 4.      For the House of God
  5. 5.      To challenge the accepted norms of our society contrary to the Word of God
  6. 6.      To stand up for peace, righteousness and justice

God wants you to release your potential in order to fulfil prophesy. Just as the colt, allow yourself to be a carrier of the presence of God this Easter-time… reach out and just see what God will do!

Hosanna!
Bible references: John 3:16, Matthew 21:1-11, Zechariah 9:9, Revelation 22:7-20, John 17:20, Luke 19:48.

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beginner’s course

JOHNWILLOUGHBY (2)

Rev. John Willoughby

8/. REPENTANCE TOWARDS GOD.

This is the first step we take to receive the salvation that God offers to us in His Son. Both John the Baptist and Jesus started right at the beginning of their ministries with a message of repentance (Mt 3:2. 4:17) and without it, we will never come into true peace with God.

1/. WHAT TRUE REPENTANCE IS NOT

a) Not just feeling guilty. I Sam 26:21. Saul felt guilty for his sins, but never truly repented, unlike King David (Ps 51). Feeling guilty comes before repentance, but is not repentance itself. No one repents unless they first feel guilty about their sin, but not all who feel guilty actually repent.

b) Not just being sorry for our sin. TJ Cor 7:10. Some people are very sorry, not for what they have done wrong, but because of the consequences of their actions or because they have been caught.

c) Not just trying to be a good person. Isa 64:6. Many try by their own self effort to become a better person, rather than trusting in God’s way of repentance.

d) Not becoming religious. Mt 3:7-8. The Pharisees fasted and prayed regularly and were extremely religious in behaviour and practice, yet never repented.

2/. WHAT TRUE REPENTANCE INVOLVES

a) Being truthful about our sin. Ps32:5. It is so easy to make excuses for ourselves, but true repentance means facing ourselves with honesty before God. The Bible says, “if we confess our sins to Him, He is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong” (I Jn 1:9).

b) Hating sin. Heb 1:8-9. God said to His people Israel, “You will took back at all your sins and hate yourselves, because of the evil you have done’ (Ez 20:43). We need to see our own sins through God’s eyes and the high price it cost Him for our forgiveness.

c) Being sorry before God for our sin. Ps 51:1-4. It is a sorrow not towards our self or towards another person, but first and foremost towards God. After Peter had denied Jesus three times he realized his failing and “left the courtyard, crying bitterly” (Lk 22:62).

d) Turning away from our sin. Zech 1:4. Sometimes we enjoy doing what is wrong, but true repentance means turning our back on these practices. In Prov 28:13 we read,

“People who cover over their sins will not prosper. But if they confess and forsake them, they will receive mercy”.

e)  When possible paying back to others what we owe. Lev 6:1-5. Upon receiving Jesus into his house Zacchaeus (the tax collector) said, “I will give half my wealth to the poor, Lord, and if I have overcharged people on their

taxes, I will give them back four times as much”. Jesus replied, “Salvation has come to this home today…..” (Lk 19.8-9).

Recompensing others for our own wrong doings brings not only reconciliation with God, but also with those we have wronged.

f)  Turning to righteous living. Zech 1:3. Paul wrote, “Do not let any part of your body become a tool of wickedness, to be used for sinning. Instead give yourselves completely to God, since you have been given new life. And use your whole body as a tool to do what is right for the glory of God” (Rom 6:13). God’s Word gives us direction not only on how to please Him, but also on how we should lead fulfilled and purposeful lives. As we determine to follow His ways, so His grace will always be sufficient to live the life He asks of us.

MY COMMITMENT

Today I decide to truly repent and will by His grace continue to keep on turning from sin and to God, as He reveals wrongdoing to me.  

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