Sermon Starters

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                                           Rev. E. Anderson

YOU LUCKY PEOPLE!

Rev. Wm Barclay

 

Two women were overheard talking on the top of a tram car. The just was bemoaning the fact that she found it desperately hard to make ends meet, that she could never get anything new, and that she could never get any of the things she wanted for the house. The second said, “We11, you know, I’ve taken a part-time job, and from it I managed to save enough to get a new carpet for the sitting-room.”

 

The first woman said enviously, “Yes, but you were always one of the lucky ones.” The second woman said with a smile, “Yes, I suppose that’s true. But I have noticed that the harder I work, the luckier I seem to be !”

 

1/. NO MAN CAN TAKE A CHANCE WHEN IT COMES TO HIM UNLESS HE HAS MADE HIMSELF READY TO TAKE IT WHEN IT DOES COME.

 

One of the grim things in life is that there are any number of people today who wish that they had worked a bit harder and studied a bit harder when they were young, because now they are passed over for promotion because-to use a colloquial phrase-they have not got what it takes.

 

This is true of the far greater things too. No man run ever hope to enter into a great friendship or a lasting love unless he has made himself, through his own efforts and through the grace of God, the kind of person for whom a real relationship and real love are possible.

 

2/. NO MAN CAN TAKE A CHANCE WHEN IT COMES UNLESS HE IS THERE TO TAKE IT.

 

A man will wait for long enough, if he waits for inspiration to come to him. Inspiration comes to the man who is prepared to work until it comes to him. The preacher, the writer, the student will and that the likeliest place to find inspiration is at his desk. He must avoid the habit of not going to his desk until inspiration has come; he must go, and inspiration will come – out of mental perspiration!

 

3/. TO MAN WHO REFUSES TO BLAME HIMSELF WILL SELDOM GET ANYWHERE.

 

There is a kind of person who blames everyone but himself. He lives in a world in which everything seems to be permanently against him. The weather, the boss, the other man, some specially malignant collection of circumstances, the general stupidity and even dishonesty of other people-this kind of person can produce them all as reasons why he has net done better than he has done, and why he has not gone further than he has gone.

 

There comes a time when a man should stop explaining what is wrong with circumstances and what is wrong with other people, and should start asking: “What is wrong with me?” For self-examination would often be the best way to a change of what is called luck.

 

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Great Stories

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                                       Rev. E. Anderson

BACK ON COURSE

Sandy Snavely

 

My husband and I love to sail. We named our 27-ft sailboat the Sensuous Sea because it represents for us how seductive the water can be to our sense of adventure. When the water is calm and the wind is stable, sailing is a profoundly rich experience. Yet there are times when the water turns evil and the wind breathes terror through our veins like an invisible enemy.

 

One day, while heading up the Columbia River On Our Way to Astoria, a sea condition appropriately known as ‘widow makers’ interrupted our peaceful voyage. Five to six-foot waves slammed against us, one right after the other, and we steadied ourselves for a bumpy ride.

 

Suddenly, Bud heard a sound that appeared to be coming from the bow. Straining to see forward through the water that the wind whipped around us, he discovered that our anchor had become dislodged from the pulpit. It was banging against our hull. With each thud, the danger of beating a hole into the fiberglass increased, threatening our safety.

 

Bud then did the most frightening thing I’ve ever seen him do. With neither a life jacket nor a life line, he made his way forward to the point of the bow, leaving me in the cockpit to man the tiller as he retrieved the anchor.

 

One of my strong-suits in sailing has always been my ability to keep our boat on course until that moment when my husband’s life was hanging precariously over the edge of the boat. Wave after angry wave crashed over hip, like great sea gypsies trying to snatch him away from me. Steadying my focus on Bud, I immediately began to plan what I would do to rescue him if indeed he went overboard.

 

The sound of my husband’s voice shouting to me through the storm broke the hold fear had on me and snapped me back to reason: ”Get back on course! Point her toward the marker!”

 

Prying my focus off of my husband and setting my sights back to the marker was the most difficult order I have ever been called to obey. It was against all my instincts to turn my back on what seemed to be the need of the moment, and trust the rules of the water. As I heeded Bud’s command, however, I was able to get us back on course. Bud fastened the anchor into its holder and we were once again headed in the right direction.

 

We both learned a valuable lesson that afternoon: danger lurks around every corner, and we can be distracted from our real goals, tempted to change the rules to solve what seems to be life’s more immediate crises.

 

But there are sound principles designed to bring us safely to our destination if we are willing to trust them and not be swayed off course by sudden fear. We must be determined to study the charts, follow the rules, and steady the course or we will end up over our heads in deep water when life’s storms hit.

 

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A Time for a Laugh

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                                      Rev. E. Anderson

CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS

 

·         We have a food program in the church for those in need which we call The Pastor’s Pantry. Well, in the magazine, I (church secretary) wrote “THE PANTY FUND – so that no one will have to go without!” Oops.

 

·         A visiting pastor came to our church and before the sermon said, “My wife and I

are very happy to be here. Honey, get up so the brothers can see you.”

 

·         We have received word of sudden passing of Rev. Smith this morning during the

worship service. Now let’s sing “Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow.”

 

·         his Sunday morning following services we will have our monthly feelowship.

 

·         Sinspiration this Sunday night at church. Ya’ll Come!

 

·         This blooper showed up on the main page of the Internet web site for the

Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada:”In a show of near anonymity, the convention approved full communion with the Anglican Church of Canada.”

 

·         Lift up our Messianic brothers and sisters in Israel who are suffering during our

prayer time.

 

·         Couples Retreat: All couples interested in a fun time, meet John in the Courtyard

Kiosk after church.

 

·         Glory of God to all and peas to his people on earth

 

·         Join us for a skirt presented by the Drama Team.

 

·         We will have a Super Bowel party this Sunday night.  We will also have our regular

service

 

·         Applications are now being accepted for 2 year-old nursery workers.

 

·         Brother Lamar has gone on to be the Lord.

 

·         The pastor will light his candle from the altar candles. The ushers will light

their candle from the pastor’s candle. The ushers will turn and light each

worshipper in the first pew.

 

·         Song Lyrics: What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and briefs to bear.

 

·         Church sign: Jesus Saves! Safeway sign across the street: Safeway saves you more!

 

·         For the group of ladies called Moms Who Care and pray for the children in school).

When their meeting was cancelled one week: There will be no Moms who care this week.

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